Dana's Mammogram Experience

I thought it might be helpful if I shared my experience for other women out there who might get a little anxious about this stuff. Find comfort in knowing, you're not alone.

During the good 'ole yearly gynecological exam we women are so very fortunate to endure - I mentioned to my doctor that I think I have developed 'fibrosystic changes' in my breasts which I understand are typical for some women to develop.

Considering I have access to a plethora of the latest information related to breast health, I figured I had the classic signs and syptoms....the American Cancer Society says fibrocystic changes are common in women but you should always discuss these things with your doctor. (Visit the American Cancer Society's website at www.cancer.org to learn more.)

OK... First mistake, self diagnosis. Don't do that. This is why people go to medical school for a million years, they are the experts.

So as my doctor is conducting the circular probing and prodding we women have all come to know as the 'breast exam' I think about how great her bedside manner is. She makes me feel so at ease as she talks about random stuff that I barely flinch when she says, "I want to send you for a mammogram."

A mammogram? I think to myself. Wait a minute, I know the American Cancer Society recommends a mammogram for women starting at age 40. Then again I also know they say your physician might recommend a mammogram sooner to get a baseline if you have a family history. OK fine. No biggee. My grandmother had breast cancer. I knew this day would be coming. Let's do this.

So I make the appointment immediately because I know how brains work. Some brains avoid doing things they dread. (Sound familiar?) I make the appointment for 1 week after my annual, just enough time to talk with enough brave women who have "survived the squeeze" to get nice and anxious about it. (I should mention that I would have pushed for an earlier appointment if I was really concerned. I hope the women out there who are concerned will push to get that appointment sooner rather than later.)

On the day of my appointment I arrive at the facility and approach the lady at the front desk to fill out the necessary paperwork. (I must digress here for a minute but its relative so bear with me.... about people greeting people... it is so funny how you can turn things around if you choose to make the first move. The woman who greeted me gave me this blank stare when I approached the desk. I swear, it must have something to do with my features. People tell me I look mad sometimes when I'm really just...well, being. It couldn't be that my facial expression was reflecting the anxiety that I was feeling. Afterall I was the one who was about to have my boob squeezed in a vice. Why isn't this woman greeting me with a big smile? Fake it lady! In a single second I think to myself Lord only knows what she is going through in her life. So I decide to conduct a little experiment....I am going to be the first one in this scenario to reach out here...."How are you this morning, are you doing ok?" I ask her. It was like a ray of sunlight had washed over this woman. From that point, you would have thought this woman and I had known each other forever the way we started chatting.

While in the waiting area I notice a few other women who seem to be a little nervous. Fidgeting with things and flinching everytime the door opened. It reminded me of how we tri-geeks get before a race. We're in control, but just a little edgy. This was not a race though. This was a mammogram. What makes a mammogram different from other tests? In my mind, with the other tests I've personally experienced there are a myriad of possibilities. As women, from around the time we enter puberty or begin the ever so faithful 'menstrual cycle' we begin to face the reality of the dreaded 'annual exam' so we're kinda used to that, but a mammogram is pretty straight forward, they're looking to detect or rule out cancer. It hits home.

Just minutes later, I hear my name called and I'm off to "the back" where I'm asked to put on a pink scrub-like top that ties in the front. Yes you heard right, pink! I love pink. Pink is God's way of making some of us girls relax. Just dress us in pink and everything is better.

More waiting and I'm called by a technician into a dimly lit room with a big machine that looks like it should be in somebody's garage. In keeping with my experiment, I decide again to be the first to reach out. I mention to the technician - who is busy jotting down notes on my file - that I'm a little nervous and this is my first mammogram, to which she immediately responds by jumping right into the nurturing nurse-like role we all remember when he had to get our shots when we were little kids. She starts explaining everything. She asks me to disrobe and stand near the machine where she proceeds to do what she is trained so well to do.

I never realized there were so many ways to squish a boob, or in my case make them any flatter! The good news is there was no pain involved. Other women who actually have boobs might disagree. I mean afterall boobs and machines don't usually mix, not that I know of anyway. The technician then explains to me that she is preforming a Diagnostic exam and there is a difference between a Diagnostic exam and a Screening exam. With a Diagnostic, they have you wait there until they review the results so they can preform other tests - such as an ultrasound - if they see anything suspicious, or if they can't get a good enough look at the breast tissue for various reasons; density of tissue, muscle mass etc. This throws me off a bit. Again, I knew all this but I suddenly start thinking about those hundreds and hundreds of women who go through this stuff under all kinds of circumstances, they have no loved ones, no money, no confidence, whatever their case may be.

I start to appreciate how lucky I am that I am strong, well informed and communicative. I realize that the hard things I've experienced in my life are the same things that have given me the strength to sail through these kinds of things. Other woman in different situations are not so lucky.

Exam, discussion with technician, and introspective thinking took a total of 7 minutes. (spoken like a true triathlete, I know.)

Back to the waiting room until yet another calm caretaker nurse-like person calls my name. She has my file and results in her hand and I'm trying to read her face (albeit I hate when people try to read my facial expression....go figure.) I'm taken into a different room this time. This room is office-like with more equipment. I have to admit, my heart is beating fast at this point. Enough small talk, bring the news. "Mrs Martin" she says soothingly... "Everything looked fine"

Whew. Thank God. I'm more than relieved and start making my way back to bust out of the pink smock that had so given me so much comfort - it's the little things people.

As I make my way out of the facility I think to myself, there are so many women who leave that same facility having just heard the words "you have cancer". If that had been the case for me, what would I have done? I admit to myself that I would first go through the emotional phase. I would emerge from that though and I would need information. I would call the American Cancer Society's helpline 1 800 ACS 2345. I would visit their website at www.cancer.org. I would call the National Cancer Institute. I would compile a list of questions for my doctor. I would explore treatment options. I would get a second opinion about treatment from other doctors. I would express myself and I would reach out to let those angels who live to take care of other people. Lastly, I would fight it like hell.

So I ask, God, why the scare today?

The answer that keeps coming back to me is....we all need reminders.

For me, I was reminded today of how fragile life is and how lucky I am to have the knowledge, skills, experience , a beautiful family, awesome people in my life, and how lucky we all are for The Mammogram. When my husband was nine years old, his mother went to the doctor for a "check-up" and she never came home. My husband later learned his mom had died from breast cancer. To this day he has no facts on what actually happened because his dad can't bring himself to talk about it. Today, my daughter's best friend's mom is in remission after being diagnosed with breast cancer when her daughter was nine years old. Go figure.

For women who might be reading this who are afraid and anxious, be reminded that you are not alone and it is ok to reach out to strangers. For me, my experiment concluded that people who are in the business of helping people are just like us, they get distracted with their own lives, with paperwork, with procedures...but if you reach out and express your feelings, you might be pleasantly surprised when you give them the opportunity to respond. Reach out.

For anyone else reading this, please remind the women in your life to talk to their doctor about mammograms. Visit the American Cancer Society's website to learn more www.cancer.org or call their helpline 1-800-ACS-2345.

Breast cancer is treatable and even curable when its detected early. This mammogram thing was such a small thing when I think about how it could have saved my life if they had found a cancer in the early stages. Be reminded.